So it was storming out tonight. Lightening, lots of rain.. etc. My boyfriend & I were gonna go home after hanging out with our friends by the lake but I wanted to stay in the rain. He’s not that affectionate of a person.. but we got out of the car & he walked with me. We sat on the rocks for a little looking out on to the lake.. no light but the moon & he held my hand. At one point it was raining really hard we were both completely soaked.. I was like “we should make this really cheesy & make out in the rain haha.” We did. As cheesy as we both knew it all was.. my heart melted. The times he’s able to show affection reminds me why I fell in love with him.

So gay. But I loved every minute of it.

Trying to get over my nervousness/fear of attempting to “top”. I am a bottom. That’s what I’ve always been.. tried to top before but it did nothing for me in a sexual sense. But being in love with a “vers” person I have to compromise & do this.

Any tips/advice would be appreciated. lol. 

So last night my boyfriend was singing Rihanna’s “Stay” while kissing/making out with me in such a passionate way I’ve never been kissed. Ok.. cheesy but inside my heart was melting. lol.

My mom gave me a hug this morning. She goes on to say, “I can wrap my arms around you now.” Because of the weight I’ve been losing.

I really needed that. Brightened up this dull day a little.

More power to people wanting to rock their “natural hair”. That’s awesome! You do you. But don’t make other people feel bad because they want to style/do their hair the way they want. Believe it or not some people do their hair for themselves not because they are ashamed of who they are/where they come from. Get the fuck out. I will do all the hair dye, flat ironing I want to my hair.. because I do it for ME. Period. lol.

I don’t understand why people on here get so offended by photos of naked people. Like what’s the big deal? You were born into this world naked. You see yourself naked at least once a day (depending on if you shower daily.. lol). It’s just the human body… what are you so offended by/scared of? 

Within the past 2 weeks I’ve lost over 400 followers all because of a few naked dudes I reblogged. Oh well. I will continue to post as I please. =)

Anyways back to my fabulous bloggin.

I am sitting outside some bar in my car. My friends inside doin his thing. But seriously after the bullshit I’ve dealt with today.. I am over this life. This whole bar scene/going out to just waste money thing is not appealing at all anymore. My idea of a good time is having a few drinks at home, a couple blunts, Netflix & good conversation with someone.

Why is it so hard to find people who are down for the same things I am? I’m not asking for the world.

Blah.

I have no trouble speaking mind & saying the things I want. But when it comes to saying the things I want to say to someone I like.. the words cannot escape me. I always freeze up & become super shy. 

I hate that. 

Just need to vent right now..

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